As in, no time. I have no time to be writing this blog post. Why? Because I decided I wanted to write another paper. This clearly indicates that I am rampagingly insane.
It also indicates that I'm on the verge of swooping through my entire 2nd year of my PhD on the same surge that I started with two years ago. Everyone who's done a PhD says that halfway through, you're guaranteed to lose the will to live as the long, hard slog approaches its solstice - the longest time yet endured, coupled with the longest time yet to go. Instead, I'm all fired up to do another chunk of writing! That's on top of nailing down my design, preparing for my first study, putting together the class I'm co-teaching this fall, and co-creating a performance.
I guess it also means I'm ambitious. I've always preferred to think of myself as utterly uninterested in ambition, or in competition, for that matter. I still stay away from competition whenever possible - nobody needs to see me get red of tooth and claw, least of all me - but I suppose I have to admit that I'd like to be taken seriously and play with the big boys, and girls, in the big pond, with the big fish, and all those things that have got People Of A Certain Age humming a certain Peter Gabriel tune right now.
Come on, sing it with me! I'll be a big noise, with all the big boys, so many... papers... I will publish...
So why am I blogging about this? First of all, because I needed to take a break. Second, I wanted Peter to get a little spike in his downloads today. Third, I wonder if I'm the only one who's in month #24 of a full-time PhD and still giddily happy about it, even if a bit stressed out. Anyone else?